And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
