you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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