So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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