Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize