we have officially mastered the walk of shame
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I love how my cats smell like pot.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
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