we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
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