Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
I have tasted many bathrooms
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
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