I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Randomize
