We tried having a conversation with our noses.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
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