Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
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