It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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