I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
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Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
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