I bet he comes in French.
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
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