Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
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