Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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