First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
He literally asked permission to hit on me
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize