watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Randomize
