make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
