If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
