ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
