bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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