so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Randomize
