Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
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