Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Randomize
