Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Randomize
