Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
All the doctor said was why
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
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