you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
