thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
