I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
Randomize
