Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
