bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
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