Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
