so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize