Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
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