I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
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