How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
im having a threesome with these popsicles
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
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