these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
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As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
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He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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