Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
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I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
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