sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
