Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
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