How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
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Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
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Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
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