Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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