What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
