i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize