NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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