I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
