i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
