No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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