i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
We got so high we made milksteak
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
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