hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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